Caregivers
often say that they wish they could switch places with the victims. They often
feel like there is not enough they can do to really help the victim of a
Traumatic Brain Injury, they feel as if all their effort is for naught.
Conversely, I am at times thankful that the accident happened to me and not my
wife. I couldn't bear to see her with a brain injury and I know I would be
tormented by the desire to have had it happen to me and not her.
So that is
the attitude I take. I choose to believe that this accident was meant for her
and I said, "No, let it be me." Immediately the question of why this
happened to me is clear. Rather than feeling sorry for myself, I stand proud
and strong. No longer am I the victim of a terrible fate; shouldering a burden
that I shouldn't have to. I have metaphysically lifted the heavy load carried
by another and made it my own. I have found the infinite strength of
compassion.
Another,
perhaps better way to think of this, is not to imagine a single person you
know, rather think of the probability of somebody getting a brain injury. There
are going to be a certain amount of brain injuries suffered by a certain amount
of people. It has to happen to somebody. Am I so cavalier as to say it should
have happened to someone else? Of course not! As terrible as brain injury is, I
would never wish it on another. So if I were to wish it didn't happen to me, it
would be like I am wishing it had happened to someone else.
My wish has
come true. Someone was going to suffer a brain injury and I said, "No, let
it be me."
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